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Do Right by Me

Learning to Raise Black Children in White Spaces

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

For decades, Katie D'Angelo and Valerie Harrison engaged in conversations about race and racism. However, when Katie and her husband, who are white, adopted Gabriel, a biracial child, Katie's conversations with Val, who is black, were no longer theoretical and academic. The stakes grew from the two friends trying to understand each other's perspectives to a mother navigating, with input from her friend, how to equip a child with the tools that will best serve him as he grows up in a white family.

Through lively and intimate back-and-forth exchanges, the authors share information, research, and resources that orient parents and other community members to the ways race and racism will affect a black child's life—and despite that, how to raise and nurture healthy and happy children. These friendly dialogues about guarding a child's confidence and nurturing positive racial identity form the basis for Do Right by Me. Harrison and D'Angelo share information on transracial adoption, understanding racism, developing a child's positive racial identity, racial disparities in healthcare and education, and the violence of racism.

Do Right by Me also is a story about friendship and kindness, and how both can be effective in the fight for a more just and equitable society.

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    • Publisher's Weekly

      Starred review from September 21, 2020
      Longtime friends Harrison, an attorney, and D’Angelo, Temple University’s assistant vice president for administration and planning, present a superb guide for white parents raising Black children. D’Angelo, the white adoptive parent of a biracial son, Gabe, and Harrison, who is Black and childless, share both personal experiences and cultural analysis. For instance, after D’Angelo recounts her son’s reluctance to join an otherwise all-white soccer team at age four, Harrison explains his reaction as reflecting how being different in itself can be damaging to self-identity. D’Angelo also discusses how raising Gabe makes her more aware of white privilege—at one point, she becomes angry at her husband for modeling, in front of Gabe, aggressive “behavior that would get our child killed,” after which Harrison recalls being warned, as a child, by elders of the danger racially biased policing poses to Black people. More generally, Harrison exhorts parents to educate themselves about how historic discrimination in housing and hiring and under the law continues to affect African Americans, and to make sure kids understand “that when they see Black people in profound disadvantage, it is not because Black people are somehow deficient.” This timely examination of discrimination and privilege is packed with insight and should be a great resource for white parents raising children of color.

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  • English

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